by Jenna | Apr 3, 2013 | Writing Articles
Seems like every time I turn around, someone I know is going through something big:
… Friends with cancer.
… My father facing health challenges.
… A neighbor’s house catching on fire.
… My cousin’s husband dying.
… Even my own roll-over car accident a few years back now.
The circle of those affected feels like it’s getting closer to me, like a tightening loop.
And it’s got me to thinking…
…Is there anything I’m not paying attention to that I want to be?
Am I going to wait for my next wake-up call, or what if I just paid attention now?
Change the rules that keep you in the dark.
Last night, we saw The Croods. I loved the message at the end: “We changed the rules that kept us in the dark.” (I love that they really spelled it out; it’s a kid’s movie after all.)
And that got me to thinking even more.
How am I keeping myself in the dark, operating out of fear rather than reaching out for tomorrow? Or living for today for that matter?
As writers and creatives, one of the biggest challenges we face every day is our fear. No wonder we act like we’re confronting our own mortality. On some level we are.
But I don’t like this question.
I’ve never liked how people say, “If you knew were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today?”
Maybe there’s something too cynical about me to fully appreciate that question, but there are things I commit to doing on a regular basis that I’m darn sure I wouldn’t do if I knew I’d be dying tomorrow, but I can’t live like that on an ongoing basis. Things like exercising and flossing and making sure my kid’s lunch is made, that yeah, I don’t think I’d pay attention to if the world was going to end.
On the other hand, I’m okay with it in the big picture.
But what about the big picture of our lives? I’m down with looking at that and making sure that what we’re doing matches with where we want to be now and where we want to end up.
Writing.
It wasn’t too long ago that I got the message, “Write like your life depends on it.”
And I’m writing every day now, which is a heck of a lot more than I was doing at the time. Which was rarely, if at all.
But am I writing like my life depends on it?
Not yet.
So am I going to wait for the next cosmic two-by-four, or am I going to do something about it?
Well, you already know the answer, right?
Do something.
Saturday I got out a pad of paper and started redesigning my schedule to put the focus on more writing. It’s not quite where I want it to be, so I’m going to do some more work on it today. And then I’m going to begin the process of shifting my schedule more and more in that direction. It’s okay with me if it takes a little while to shift; it’s a kind of gradual herding things into the right corrals. But it works.
Having fun.
The other persistent message that I simply have to do something about is FUN.
I’m good at working hard, you probably know that about me by now.
And I’m fairly good at really luxuriating when I give myself the chance. (I just love taking days off and putting my feet up and watching movies and eating great food and treats.)
But I just don’t give myself the chance very often.
I come from a long line of self-sacrificers and workaholics and the buck is going to have to stop here, now.
The funny thing is, I’m still not sure what I truly want it to look like, this fun thing. Writing is fun, but it’s also work.
I think it’s more about lightness of spirit and regular adventures. I hesitate to schedule time for fun. But I also used to hesitate to schedule time for writing, and look where that got me!
What if fun was worth making time for?
That sounds like a ridiculous question even as I write it.
But sometimes my brain needs an excuse to think of things in a new way.
Being appreciative and being present.
And last, I think my perhaps my biggest one, is about appreciation and presence. I’m so good at appreciating things in other people, but not so good at appreciating them in my own life. This is huge, and hard to admit. I’ve got more work to do here.
My recent tech shabbats have shown me about the power of being present and not checked out into my own little world. So I’m getting there. And there’s more. There always is.
What about you?
If this was your wake-up call, what would it be?
What is the voice of your spirit asking you to pay attention to right now?
What have you been neglecting but you know, deep down, you want to attend to?
If the Universe was going to give you a whack upside the head with a cosmic two-by-four, what would it be trying to tell you?
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by Jenna | Dec 12, 2012 | Writing Articles
If you have a dream to write or create, you probably have your sights set on the new year as a good time to recommit to your goal.
You probably also believe that once we've passed through the holiday ring of fire, you'll have cleared a lot of new space, time, and energy that has otherwise been occupied with shopping, events, and clearing your desk for the holidays.
Glorious guilt and procrastination
And, surprise, surprise, there do tend to be a few glorious days in January of peace and quiet... but usually with the essence of guilt and procrastination swirling around the edges.
Because even though you've promised yourself you'll get started right away on your writing or art or dream, you don't.
It's not what you think it is
But don't feel guilty. It's completely normal. You see, once you actually have that big block of time you've been longing for, the raw, naked fear comes bounding in and masquerades as wanting to sleep in or take some time off after all the hubbub. What's wrong with that? "Yeah, I know I said I would write today but it's new year's day and I just want to get a little more sleep. I just want to spend the day relaxing for a change."
It looks like needing time off (and you probably do actually need it) but it's really fear.
Here's the thing
(And, yes, we've talked about this before.)
Resistance comes up around anything worth doing.
We tend to recommit -- at least mentally -- to the concept of doing those things in the form of new year's resolutions.
Guess what?
Those resolutions trigger even more resistance.
Which leads to more distractions, and smokescreens, and procrastination. And stress. And self-doubt.
No more stories
There's ALWAYS something.
Always.
So.
How about instead of making resolutions, we decide to make new life decisions about setting ourselves up for a long-term, sustainable, regular practice of our art? No more grand sweeping gestures and big talk but instead an actual realistic, attainable plan to take small, daily actions to move you toward your goal?
For instance:
- If you want to write, commit to writing for 15 minutes a day.
- If you want to move your business forward, commit to doing the hardest tasks first (usually marketing, right?), for 15 minutes a day, every day.
- If you want to paint, set yourself up so that you can paint a little bit every day. Use the two-second rule to make sure your watercolors and sketchbook are close to hand.
Find the smallest increment of absolutely do-able, sustainable, accomplishment you know you can meet, and commit only to that, nothing more. If you find yourself not doing it, make it smaller. And let me know how it goes.
Warmly,
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by Jenna | Oct 26, 2011 | Writing Articles
When Joss Whedon’s sci-fi western television series, “Firefly,” was cancelled by the Fox network in 2002, the fans of the show were devastated. But Joss told his actors that he wouldn’t give up and that he would find the show a new home.
Eventually, he found that place with Universal Studios in 2005, where they made a feature length movie called Serenity and resurrected the “Firefly“ story.
Joss says about his movie making, “It’s not to make things people like. It’s never to make things people like. It’s only to make things that they love.”
Refusing to Let It Go
What I love about this story (in addition to loving the show, though I’ve lost my affection for Joss Whedon himself as time has gone on), is that he was so committed to vision and believed in it so much, that he refused to give up. And his fans and cast did too. Joss says about the experience, “[People] fell in love with it a little bit too much to let it go, too much to lay down arms when the battle looked pretty much lost. In Hollywood, people like that are called ‘unrealistic’ … ‘quixotic’ … ‘obsessive’.”
He seems to be totally okay with that. :)
When he presented the first footage of the movie at San Diego Comic Con, he said to the assembled masses of fans, “This movie should not exist. Failed TV shows don’t get made into major motion pictures unless the creator, the cast, and the fans believe beyond reason.”
Isn’t that the most beautiful turn of phrase?
What Do You Believe Beyond Reason?
What are you so ridiculously over the moon about that it makes you giddy just to think about?
The word passion has become so overused in our culture today, I’m not even sure we know what it means anymore.
To most of us it apparently means something like, “What do you think is a realistic way to make money that you would enjoy doing?”
And while that is a useful question when one is paying one’s bills, it is NOT really the same question as “What are you passionate about?”
Seems to me it’s time to change the question.
Let’s start asking, “What do you BELIEVE BEYOND REASON?”
“What do you believe in so deeply, so permanently, so passionately that you can hardly keep yourself in your skin because you are exploding with joy when you consider it?”
“What brings tears to your eyes when you allow yourself to even just consider the possibility that you might be lucky enough to do it for a single minute of your life?”
Do that. And do it as quick as you can.
Because really, why would we do anything else?
Time’s a wastin.’
Warmly,
by Jenna | Nov 16, 2010 | Writing Articles
One of the participants at my recent retreat shared this powerful quote from Barbara Sher, “Isolation is a dream killer.”
Similarly, my teacher Sonia Choquette says, “You cannot do it alone.”
How true!
As a sensitive woman, mother, home-based business owner, spiritual coach, intuitive, hand analyst, and ready-to-take-the-world-by-storm creative writer, I can tell you that the hardest days are when I feel like I have no one to turn to and there’s no one else out there who gets who or where I am. Luckily, I’ve learned a few things about this along the way.
When it comes to making your dreams real, here are a few things to keep in mind:
1. Your nascent vision is like a tiny seedling. Plant it in fertile soil, water it, nurture it, and protect it. Don’t put it somewhere it could be trampled on. Share it only with your best supporters.
2. Get the right support from the right people. You must have “believing eyes” to witness your project into wholeness. Do not allow the naysayers and doubters to topple your tiny creation before it learns to stand on its own two feet.Get in touch with your supporters when you need them, and do the same for them. Make sure you have a balanced, equal exchange with people who are emotionally whole enough to truly be there for you.
3. Dream big or stay at home. Don’t hold back from your vision — go all the way with it. Push yourself to your creative edge. Ask, “How can I take this to its next greatest level of expression?” If you need help pushing yourself to that precipice, you’re in the right place. You’ll be seeing more from me modeling this very, very soon (stay tuned!).
4. Don’t take your critics too seriously. Like most of us, you probably make the mistake of listening to criticism (from yourself or from other people) far too early in your creative process. Your inner critics are speaking from fear and doubt, and your outer critics are doing the same. Very often, your outer critics are simply projecting their own fear and excuses onto you. So take it with a grain of salt. And turn to your supporters to get you back on track when you make the mistake of listening to the wrong voice.
5. Trust yourself, first. So often you dismiss your greatest, deepest truths because you think they are too simple, too complicated, too unrealistic, etc. But if you simply allow yourself the permission to explore what your inner voice is telling you, miraculous things can happen. You may want and need to have your inner truths heard and witnessed before you’re willing to give ourselves that permission.
That’s where your supporters or coach come into play. Either way, sometimes allowing yourself to voice your vision to the right listeners is just the powerful kick-start you need to make your dream become a reality.
