The other day I had an email from a friend about me screenwriting at 6 a.m. every morning. She said, “I admire your discipline. It must come from a deep passion.”
I thought, “Is this passion? Is this discipline? Is that what this is? That doesn’t quite feel right.”
Perhaps this is because I’ve struggled for so long to be clear about what I’m passionate about that the word “passion” has lost meaning for me.
Then, last week I found myself saying to my writing community participants how you would have to fight me off with a sword to keep me from writing.
And I thought, “Huh! Passion.”
But the clincher was when I saw Jeanne Bowerman‘s tweet:
I knew my own answer was “No. Way.”
Then I got it. This is beyond reason, it’s beyond passion. It’s a kind of fierceness I never expected.
What shocks me is that this fierceness has been born out of the discipline of writing on a daily basis, not the other way around. And I hesitate to even call it discipline, because there are days when I have to drag myself out of bed with bribes and threats alike. The funny thing is that it’s gotten more scary NOT to write than TO write.
I didn’t know I would love writing like this. I had no idea until I started doing it regularly. Daily. At ungodly hours.
I’m also fascinated to have discovered that taking a day off or two DOES dwindle this feeling. I find myself drifting and uninspired when I stop.
But as long as I write every day or darn close to it, I’m good.
And I’m doing this by making it a LOT harder NOT to write than it is TO write:
- I set my clock early. If I don’t get up and write immediately, I’ll miss my chance before my husband goes to work and I’ve got kid duty.
- I set public goals with my writing community EVERY DAY. And they notice if I don’t show up.
- I have assignments due every day for my ProSeries screenwriting class. And they’re counting to make sure we’re doing the assignments.
- I’m the coach for the writing community too, so I have a responsibility as a role model too.
I’ve got multiple layers of accountability. Plus a healthy fear that if I stop writing, it’ll be hard to get started again. And a fierce belief that I’ve found my true calling.
Jenna,
I’ve noticed this too, since being in your Writer’s Circle and beginning to write on a regular basis. The passion has grown out of the commitment and I feel as though nothing can stop me from finishing my project now.
Carey — that’s fabulous! I love having you in the Circle too. I love that, “nothing can stop me from finishing my project now.” Go go go!
Hey Jenna
There is one small thing I wanted to know, which is maybe slightly off-topic, but still on-topic. How important is it do you think to have supportive factors in place to do your writing? Supportive relationships, a supportive place conducive to writing… Can you write if you feel like significant parts of the rest of your life are in turmoil?
Just throwing it out there, though I think I already know the answer :)
Best wishes,
Clare
Clare, great question actually! It has been harder for me to write during difficult emotional times (losing a loved one) but I have found that so many of my other ideas about what I needed (like the right place to write or a long chunk of time to write) have turned out to be not that important. And even with the difficult emotional circumstances, I still find that writing regularly is a kind of healing balm that brings me back to myself. It’s like I find myself through my writing again. I’d love to have you join us in the Writer’s Circle if you’ve got a project in mind — sounds like you have something brewing. Let’s get it written! :)
For me, too, it’s the lost feeling I get when I don’t write the keeps me returning to the page. I can hear myself think better when I capture my thoughts on the page. I discover thoughts I didn’t know I had by putting my pen to the page.
Sean, I love how you said that, “it’s the lost feeling I get when I don’t write that keeps me returning to the page” — and the self-discover process — so true! Thanks for sharing.
this stimulates further curiosity about the inner dynamics of creativity and the power of commitment!
clarity does not necessarily bring commitment. commitment brings clatity.
happy to have you in my life jenna<3
Sanna, you are right! Commitment brings clarity. Thank you for writing that for us to see. :)